Eps 52: 9 Things I Would Do If I Would Win The Lottery


Now and then I see something or think of something and sigh because it is out of my reach. And then I think ‘if I would win the lottery I would..’ followed by a quick suppression of the thought because I think it is childish to think in such a way. Also, I find it mildly depressing to realize that I am limited by lack of financial means.

But then there is the other side. And that is if am afraid to be open about these wishes and desires they will definitely not be heard or recognized. You can’t grow a tree if you are afraid to plant the seed.

Eps 51: How To Hold On To Inner Peace


One of my warriors had an experience like above. She is thrilled by it. It is beautiful to receive such a gift for the first time. But later in the day that started so beautifully she had some difficult interactions. Her question was ‘how do I hold on to my inner peace?’ This is interesting! The moment we receive some inner peace we want to hold on to it. We want to own it, possess it. Our greedy ego wants to put it in his pocket and write his name on it. Mine! But inner peace it now something that you can own

Eps 50: Courage Is A Love Affair With The Unknown

Courage is a love affair

Being a warrior means identifying your learning edge, accepting it, taking a deep breath and boldly stepping into the unknown terrain with nothing else to hold onto than a vague sense that this is the right thing to do. Your inner coward will come up with excuses, justifications, reasons and alternatives to not have to go there. This way he functions as an excellent guide: he will tell you precisely where you should not go. This is exactly where you should go. Counter-intuitive? Only from the coward’s perspective.

Eps 49: 11 Random Things That Are Awesome

Hippies Kissing

Today I was in a gloomy mood. I felt uncomfortable, dissatisfied and somewhat disheartened. As I was just cooking up a meal, feeling burdened by the idea that I still have to write a post even though it is quite late already and I have to work tomorrow, I decided to write about things that cheer me up. Just random stuff that comes up in the next 15 minutes. Here we go:

Eps 48: Visualizing A Possible Next Step


I am imagining a place, a building for example where the people who work there share a commitment to be real and mindful. It is not about being holy but just about trying to avoid mindlessness and ignorance. The workplace becomes a place of practice, meaning that at the end of the week you actually learned something about yourself and others instead of merely exhausting and depleting yourself.

Eps 47: Who Do You Serve?


If you have a room full of people with an IQ of over 120 why don’t ask yourself how to make the world a better place instead of how to make as much money as possible? Not only because it is noble to not be motivated by greed but because it opens so many more interesting possibilities. Trying to make a difference leads inevitably leads to uncovered and therefore adventurous terrain. Being rich never leads to fulfillment, being useful does.

Eps 46: “That Just Made My Day”

Rainbow over Amsterdam

Fuck. She made me cry again. Only this time in a crowded coffee shop. The relief I felt was amazing. It was very strange to feel limited in the expression of joy. I looked around me with my tear-filled eyes and realized that nobody else’s life had changed so drastically. For them the place was the same as 30 seconds ago, for me it felt totally different. My energy was rushing through my body and I want to jump around and celebrate. Being the whole place a round of coffee crossed my mind. Funny enough I also felt the urge to buy brownies or apple pie or something. It seemed the only way to give myself the feeling that I was celebrating.

Eps 45: When Life Pulls The Rug From Underneath You

Rug Pull

Today I came from a meeting in Utrecht and on my way back I was contemplating my next step in life. I accidentally saw some notes I made during a meeting with a like-minded soul some time ago. The notes were about intention and visualization. I was watching the daylight turning into soft and warm tones as the time of sunset approached. A peaceful silence came over me. I felt the courage and inspiration coming bubbling up to verbalize the next step of my vision. Although I am not sure what it is I feel that there is something ready to come out.

Eps 44: The Difference Between Conscience And Consciousness


A man who lives through conscience becomes hard. That is a pretty bold statement. In my mind conscience is relating to seeing right from wrong. But as I continue reading I realize Osho is right: in most cases our conscience becomes mixed up with our Judging Mind. Although I also feel that conscience is related to the heart I can see that our conscience can become contaminated by fear and we confuse what is right with what people say is right.

Eps 43: Why Ruthless Compassion Is Needed


Many of us think that compassion is synonymous with being friendly and don’t see how their friendliness is motivated by fear. We believe that we can’t be “mean” or “rude” to others, even if this means supressing our own needs and feelings. We let our boundaries be violated because we like to be a good person so badly. In reality, true compassion has nothing to do with being nice and everything to do with doing the right thing for ourselves and others. And when your compassion is not completely honest, it is not compassion but a lie.