Don’t fight the sadness

Osho Zen Tarot - Sorrow

“If you don’t fight the sadness it will transform into tenderness”. I just wrote that on the Basic Goodness Facebook page. I let these one-liners come up out of my awareness. I will sit down, close my eyes and look into myself to see what is going on right now. I have to concentrate pretty hard, listen very, very closely to distill the words out of the feeling. But my Higher Self never disappoints me, I can’t remember I ever got an ‘answer’ that I judged unworthy for publishing. Often I’m surprised how deep and profound it sounds and sometimes I am pleased with the simplicity.

Am I fighting sadness? Yes. I must say I feel tormented. I have been walking away from some deep sadness for quite a few days and it’s becoming unbearable. I really truly seem unable to face the fact that my relationship has stranded.

11 reasons why you should unravel the secrets of your life


Would you like to know what the secret is of living mindfully? Or don’t you even know what that means but you are curious? Do you want to find the doorway to inner peace and feel a Universal connectedness? Let me take you by the hand.

Take an upright position and straighten your back. It can be on your bed, in your chair on the couch or on the floor, wherever you are sitting right now with your laptop, smart phone or iPad. Now relax into this uplifted position, enjoy the goodness of sitting upright and having a straight spine for a couple of moments. This is you being you, feel the simplicity and the dignity of that.

For my little brother

My little brother

Yesterday my brother told me he never felt as if he had a brother, or that he never felt that I was a brother for him. As I write all this down, for the first time drawing the complete picture for myself, I feel we never had a chance. I’m naming now three major influences that drove us apart but I can think of more. It breaks my heart when I oversee all the suffering we went through and I can only imagine how lonely and rejected my little brother must have felt during his childhood, often alone in his room.

I wish I could just turn back the clock and do it all over again. I wish I could make all the beatings and humiliations undone. But I can’t. I regret that from the bottom of my soul. It is very tough for me to see how tough my brother has become. I feel very guilty and intense grief. I sob behind my laptop

Surviving Christmas


As I type these first words I find myself in an airplane flying over Afghanistan. But I’m quite sure that even if I finish this post within a couple of hours it will not be published until we reach our B&B on Bali. Unless I find time and WiFi in Singapore during our stop over that is.

There is something disorienting about flying through timezones. After lunch has been served they turn off the lights at two o’clock in the afternoon and we are supposed to go to sleep. For some reason it works, and I truly have asked myself often if they put tranquilizers in the food. Now, two hours later, I have woken up and when I look outside I stare into pitch-blackness. We are flying through the middle of the night. It is 16:33.

Maybe flying is so disorienting because it messes with our expectations.

Own your stuff

Two swans

Let’s not beat around the bush: I think that relationships are very difficult and I don’t feel very successful at having or maintaining them. It has always been a struggle for me and still is. But I would like to design a workshop that gives some real tools and insights because I feel there is a great need for that. Ok, I need those tools and insights for myself and I need them right now, because my relationship is falling apart as we speak. But yesterday’s conversation gave me the opportunity to look at my own case from another perspective. And I would like to share what I have been learning although I don’t feel that I’ve got it completely yet. It’s still work in progress.